kimproper: "You sound different. Do you have a beard?!" —Liz Lemon permalink
Top tweets from June 3rd, 2011
StephenAtHome: I wonder if it’s hard for a cricket doing standup at a comedy club to tell if they’re bombing. permalink
GuyEndoreKaiser: Cameron Diaz and A-Rod broke up. No word yet on who gets custody of the creepy body they share. permalink
robdelaney: I feel the God-like power of a serial killer when I survey my freezer’s obscene selection of Ben & Jerry’s pints. permalink
SlappNuttz: Walmart could make a killing if they added an abortion clinic to each store. permalink
erikprice: I think I just saw Dax Shepard walking down the street. God I hope that was him. I am so close to finishing this bucket list. permalink
ninky: "Klout believes you are influential about cats." LIVING THE DREAM. @klout http://t.co/i6waoyA permalink
RexHuppke: Very few rap songs mention sitting around with your buddies drinking Zima. permalink
Kalli: Watching Lethal Weapon 2 and waiting for Mel Gibson to say something about the Jews. permalink
goldengateblond: I don’t know who invented air conditioning but right about now I’m so grateful I’d make out with his rotting corpse. permalink
HerMaeness: You can calculate somebody’s quality of life by how many times they whine about their follower count. permalink
