Top tweets from March 19th, 2010

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3hoss: No matter what your politics, I think we’d all like to see an elephant having sex with a donkey. permalink
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katefeetie: You guys. My parents just tried to explain Twitter to me. permalink
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SlappNuttz: I believe I’ve reached the max number of times I can masturbate in one day… This last time, the only thing that came out was an IOU. permalink
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awryone: 30 minutes? I want to hear that from the pizza. Put the pizza on the phone. permalink
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Aimee_B_Loved: I put my underwear on like anyone else. Backwards, two legs in one hole, falling down then decide it’s easier to go without. permalink
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luckyshirt: When you stop and think about them, treadmills are really dangerous. permalink
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iamnotdiddy: "Sir, masturbation is only permitted in First Class. Please put your pants on and… no… you keep the napkin, sir." permalink
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iamnotdiddy: "Dad, did you want to be a janitor when you grew up? Or did that just happen?" permalink
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CroweJam: The Tiger Woods and Jesse James Clubhouse sign: "Sometimes you get a hankerin’ to go-a-skankerin’." permalink
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biorhythmist: This Peter Pan joke never gets old. permalink
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NikiWithIssues: He’s just not that into you. Just the tip. permalink
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k2bf: Blowjobs are like bacon jokes. I don’t get them. permalink
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nerdist: Weird @alyankovic’s ACTUAL childhood home movies! Hilarious! Adorable! Charming! Fourth Exclamation! http://afx.cc/almovies permalink
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mashable: Conan Launches a Twitter Contest for Tour Tickets - http://bit.ly/9BywIi permalink
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JuliaMancuso: http://twitpic.com/19j98h - This Verbier Xtreme, is extreme! Which line should I take?! permalink
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HuffPostTech: YouTube: Viacom Uploaded ‘Roughed Up’ Clips To Make Them Look Pirated http://bit.ly/adcWIh permalink
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parislemon: Those Facebook QR Codes Are Part Of Their Location Plans http://tcrn.ch/adMaoj permalink
 

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